Resentment Towards Parents in Adulthood

I’ve noticed a common theme with folks in their 20s, 30s, and beyond. Still feeling stuck in resentment toward their parents. A lot of it comes from waiting for an apology or some kind of acknowledgment for what they didn’t get growing up emotionally, mentally, even physically.

And look, for people who went through serious trauma in childhood, that’s a whole different level of healing. This post isn’t about minimizing that.

But I’m talking more about those lingering hurts and expectations, feeling like your parent should finally “get it,” change, say sorry, show up differently.

Truth is, most of our parents won’t change. They are who they are. They raised us based on what they knew, what they were taught, and what they had access to emotionally.

That doesn’t mean your feelings may or may not bevalid.
That doesn’t mean you didn’t deserve better. But at this stage in life, holding onto the hope that they’ll suddenly become who you needed back then? That keeps you stuck.

The healing is on us now.
We get to do the work to re-parent ourselves.
To give that younger version of us the care, attention, validation, and love they didn’t get.

You might never get the apology. But you can still find peace.

Reach out for help if you are feeling stuck and weighed down by resentment.